Before you send or book: seven questions.
A practical one-page decision worksheet. No email required.
Use an alias, keep this sheet to yourself and answer for one commitment — not for the whole relationship. Print or save as PDF using the button at the end.
- What exact action am I deciding on, and by when? Write the amount, booking or promise and its deadline. Distinguish a real deadline from pressure to answer immediately.
- What have I directly confirmed? A transfer record confirms a payment. A message confirms that someone made a statement. Neither proves the entire explanation behind it.
- What is still unknown, and which answer would change my action? Select the most material gap rather than building an endless suspicion list.
- What would I commit now, in what currency, and what is reversible? Separate already-spent money from new exposure. Include fees and actual cancellation conditions, not assumptions.
- What happens if I pause this commitment? Record the practical consequence and a respectful way to communicate the pause. A pause is not a test designed to provoke someone.
- What remains under my control if the plan changes? Consider independent accommodation, transport, access to funds and a return plan. Do not surrender passwords or account control.
- What is my next action and review point? Write GO, WAIT or STOP for the named action, the conditions attached, and a date to review new information.
My decision in one sentence
I will ________ the commitment of ________ until ________ is clarified. I will review this on ________.
Important limits
These questions organise a decision; they do not establish someone's intentions. For someone you have not met in person, the FTC advises against sending money or gifts. If fraud is suspected, contact the payment provider promptly; do not wait for a paid review. Legal, visa, investment, clinical and emergency questions require the relevant qualified service.
Before Further · Version 1, 4 October 2026 · Method · Complete illustrative memo